It's hard to say goodbye

I had to say goodbye to my kids today. Thankfully, I was able to tell them that I was leaving. Before, they were just going to send a letter home with them which I thought was shady shady.

Anyway, It was a short day, only until 12. Normally, this would make me very happy, but today I just wanted to savor every giggle, every snuggle, every "Teacher Ashooly," every smile. I found myself just staring at these children and thinking about how beautiful they were and how special God made them. It has been more than a privilege to share my time with these precious children.

My coteacher, Sunny, and I didn't even make it one minute before we were both crying when we told them. She asked me to say some last words to my kids, and I couldn't even get anything out. It's a kind of goodbye I've never had to do before. The one where it's goodbye forever. I think I sputtered out the words "I've loved being your teacher, I'll miss you, and I love you..." but no other words would come. I had two kids that cried the whole rest of the class. One of them was a boy that I often questioned whether or not he even liked me. I guess he was impacted greater than I would've ever known.

My prayer is that they learned something from me. That I represented the love of Christ by loving on them each day.

I'm really going to miss their free spirits and unconditional love. I'm going to miss the way their little hands feel in mine, and the way that they giggle at the silliest things.

I'm also really going to miss my coteacher, Jisun. Like she always says, "we share the same heart for our children"... She has loved on me and taken care of me, encouraged me, and looked past my many mistakes and shortcomings as a teacher. I love her, and will greatly miss her friendship. I hope she will come visit me in Texas soon!

I only have a week and a half left. So much to do, and all I want to do is play with all these wonderful people that I will miss so much! Please pray that I have a VERY productive weekend :)

Mom, Dad, and Amy, see you in Hawaii in 12 days!

Closing A Chapter

The "Korea" chapter is coming to a close. I feel like it's going to be a part of my life that I look back on one day and think to myself, "did that really happen?"

I really am going to miss this place, but I know it's definitely time for me to go home. Everything about the decision to return to the States feels completely right. I finally feel a peace that has been so unfamiliar to me. These 18 months in the far East have been the hardest times in my short 23 years, but it's through these times that I learned the most. I feel like I've really gotten to know me. The me who exists outside of the identity I found in my college, my friends, and my family. I also figured out the me I don't want to be. The me who is so consumed in a relationship that once was; the me who can't figure out who I am outside this person. The me who never felt like enough. The me who waited for nothing but lies and disappointments. What a feeling to finally let go, and start over.

I am so grateful that the Lord has given me an opportunity to go home and start over.

This is the question I get asked like 19837498723 times a day, so here's the answer:

What are you doing when you get back???

1. Work on getting the photography ministry rolling. I was going to call it "window of hope ministries" but googled it and it's already taken. Hmm. I guess I'll have to keep thinking on that one. Basically, the ultimate goal is to teach full time during the year, and on summer break take trips for the ministry.
2. Get certified to teach in the State of Tejas. (Who knew this would cost a whopping $5000... EEK! I guess that's what I saved in Korea for!) It's a 6 month program, and I am wanting to get the early childhood general certification, and I'm going to go ahead and get my ESL certification while I'm at it since that's what I'm experienced in. Hey, what's another 2 tests right?
3. Hopefully get a teaching aide position somewhere near Keller. My resume, letter of interest, and letters of recommendation have been sent out to about 50 Elementary schools in Keller ISD, Carroll ISD, and HEBISD. Please pray that I get a job! It would be really awesome if I could get one in a preK class, but I'll take what I can get gratefully!
4. Revisit Spanish. Who knew that these days half the teaching jobs in the metroplex require you to be billingual??? Plus, you get paid more if you know Spanish. I gotta get crackin on those verbs!

That's the plan right now, professionally. Personally, the plan is to get lots of sun at the lake, bake and cook all the things I've desperately wanted to make here but couldn't, spend lots of time with my grandparents, love on my dear friends and family, get involved at IBC again, and repair the relationships that might've suffered while I've been away these past 18 months.

God is so good for getting me through all of this and giving me a fresh start. I can't wait to join all of you back in America in about 3 weeks!

16 days until I'm in Hawaii with my dear family :)

Goodness I started packing the stuff I hadn't packed yet, and it's going to be rather nightmarish trying to get it all home. Looks like I'm just going to have to buy a new wardrobe when I get home. Sounds terrible! haha.

Enjoy your week, and try not to miss me too much.

If you're bored here's a song by my fav Korean pop, girl group 2ne1....CLICK HERE

Also, this is probably my favorite Korean pop artist, Taeyang (member of Big Bang) he's super talented and oh so sexy... haha... CLICK HERE

Random Picture Update

So these are all out of order, and really random, but I wanted to put them up!

These pictures are from Stephanie's "official" going away dinner, even though I think we had about 8 going away meals! haha.

At a really yummy coffee shop near Suwon Station where we ate Potbingsu! From the front left: Juan, me, Stephanie, Amanda, Kathy, Cameron, and Pak In

One more time in the coffee shop. From the left: Juan, me, Stephanie, Amanda, kathy, Cameron, and Anthony

Me and Stevie on her last Friday in Korea :( So glad we will be together again in Keller!

The next pics are from Alyssia's going away party earlier in the month... a little late :)

All of us at dinner... there are way too many people to list off everyone!

Don't worry, I wasn't seriously trying to pose like this... I was imitating some ridiculous pose Koreans use sometimes.

Me and Steph at Mr. Pizza

Next we went to Karaoke with the whole crowd... apparently she liked what Anthony was doing!

Alyssia on the stage doin her thing

everyone doing the macarena! hahaha

Kathy (and Stephanie in the background) singing something awesome I'm sure

Next, me and Stephanie went on a picnic in the park and reading! Such a WONDERFULLY PERFECT day!

Ready Whip is close to $16 here. Who would pay that much for whipped cream in a can???

The last pictures are from the last World Cup Game that Korea played in. Such a good game, but sadly they lost. We had quite the little party.

Kathy making rice crispy treats! Yum!

Juan, Anthony, and Tony decked out in their red waiting for the game to start.

I don't know what was happening here ?

Tony and Tony were matchy matchy in their couple shirts! haha

Me and Juan waiting for the game to start!

Lastly, I was riding a school bus last week, and look out my window, and see Jared Lyons on the side of a bus! hahahah. I was dying laughing... so random. I guess they took it when he was in Korea about 3 years ago.

Well even my parents stopped commenting these days, so I don't know who reads this, but if you are, have a wonderful week! 3 weeks from today I'll be on my way outta here! AH!

Zoo Field Trip and Bazaar

So these are a little late... they both were sometime in Early June. Oops. I kind of forgot about these pictures, so here they are better late than never.

The first group is from our Zoo field trip at Everland. It was sad because it rained the WHOLE time we were there. Nothing like going to the zoo in the rain. Luckily they provided us all with awesome ponchos!

This is Daniel... one of my favorite little babies :)

Jemin and Sarah waiting to go in... staying (kind of) dry.

All our kiddos lined up to go in. It was next to impossible to tell which kids were mine and which belonged to another teacher... pure craziness!

Ian, Paul and David

Andy and Emma... Emma is sooo cute.

On the safari! It was super cool. There were Lions, Tigers and Bears (oh my!) and giraffles, elephants, and Emus I think. The bears came up to the drivers window and ate. Very neat!

Jeong Yoon on the bus safari ride

Joyce visiting the monkeys

Youna and Joyce in the monkey house

Grace with the fishies.

Paul... such a good looking kid and so smart. love him!

Andrew... he's always in "Andrew world" I wish I knew what was going on in his head. Apparently he's extremely smart. Like almost genius level. He can read full sentences in English while the rest of the kids are still working on letter recognition... whoa.

David and Ian at the fish tank.


This is a really random picture, but Amy sent me some things to make hair accessories, so I was just trying it out. These are the first 2 (and only 2 *^^* that I've made so far! haha)

The next pictures are from our school Bazaar. This was probably one of the coolest things CCA does. Mostly it's cool because it's a school day that we don't have to teach :)

Basically all the classes (every homeroom has a class name... mine is Dandelion class) have mom's that volunteer to think of a product to sell. Some fun ones were CCA umbrellas, swimsuits (most of the kids take swim class), hair bows, CCA safari hats, plants... basically all kinds of things! On the day of the bazaar, every class sets up their booths and sells their products. The profits go to help the school. For this year it was to remodle the gym, which definitely needs to be done, by the way. All the teachers are also in charge of working at certain things. Kindergarten was in charge of the Cambodia booth, where people could give money for missions.

Here's Caroline all dressed up for working at the booth...

While I wasn't working the booth, we were allowed to play and buy stuff. I was enjoying some pineapple on a stick here...yummy. Oh, and aren't these pastel orange polos fantastic?? I'm going to be wearing it all the time back at home for sure :)

Erin enjoying something Korean and noodly... haha

Part of the bazaar... it was super packed out!

I saw some of my kiddos (all CCA students are required to attend the bazaar at some point) while I was working the booth! Jemin is on my left, and Paul on my right.

Me and my Joyce... she had just visited the hair curling booth :)

Carolina, Me and Erin... love them!

Cassia, Halley, and Erin working our Cambodia booth.

Me and my Jeong Yoon... she was clearly happy to see me

Cameron came by the bazaar just in time to nail Ken in the face with a sponge at his booth. I'm not sad I didn't get to work this booth!

Well, that's all for this update. I should probably go to bed or something... No school tomorrow! Yippee! I can't wait.

It was weird, I posted my moving sale on facebook today, and it's making it feel more real that I'm leaving :/ I'm not sad, it's just a weird feeling to be closing this chapter....

I'll write again soon. Have a great week! 24 days left in Korea!